kirpo's living room

And to my wife, I apologize. All I can say is, I wasn’t just having sex. I was making love… to a beautiful woman. And her boyfriend. And a third person whose name I never learned. Furthermore, it was wrong of me to say I was building houses for the underprivileged when I was actually having four-way sex in a cave in Brazil.

(…)

In my defense it was my birthday. And I really wanted to do it.

— Bill Dexhart (Parks and Recreation, S02E04)